You are sitting across the table from that charming blonde that you've somehow managed to meet. Hands shaking, your mind at a halt, you try to come up with something clever to say that you hope will impress her enough so that she will start to really like you. There's an uncomfortable silence as you try to hold on to the last remains of a thought in your head. But you don't say anything. And when you finally do, it comes off stilted and quite weird. The date does not end well.
Sound familiar? I've been through enough of those. Listen, if you've managed to get a girl's attention, it's not enough. Getting phone numbers from women isn't worth anything if you cannot communicate normally with her when you finally meet her.
Here are the things you need to avoid doing if you want to gain back the POWER in your interactions with women.
1. Being insecure. This is like cyanide when it comes to the relationship between you and the girl. Insecurity is the biggest attraction killer of them all. It means you do not like being in your own body, you do not know what to say when the situation calls for you to say something, you just are not certain at all about your position in life or where you're headed. Almost all women are out looking for a STRONG man. And I don't mean strong physically, I mean strong psychologically. Insecurity displays zero confidence, it telegraphs that you are weak.
2. Being needy. If you don't know many girls, it may seem to you that the one you are talking to is your last chance on Earth to get laid, ever. It may seem that if nothing happens with THIS ONE GIRL, then you're never ever going to succeed with women. And this attitude is the next biggest factor that will all but eliminate your chances with her. Neediness shows up when you NEED the girl to be with you, because apparently no one else want to be with you. This one is easily cured, by the way - just go out and meet more girls!
3. Putting yourself down. A big no-no. You are telegraphing your own self-esteem, or your lack of it, when you talk negatively about anything related to you or your personality. If you keep dissing your previous girlfriends, then what kind of conclusions do you think the girl is going to make about YOU? Hint: they are not very positive ones. I do not mean for you to become an overly optimistic, unrealistic "self-marketer", displaying only the best sides of yourself (though that approach certainly has its merits). But I do mean that you should avoid giving out negative signals about yourself if possible, and focus on your strengths. Men that like themselves and their life are sexy.
4. Not "getting it". Now, what do I mean by getting "it"? It can sometimes be hard to explain, but I think you kind of know what I mean. Getting it means you're in the flow, being successful with women is something that is in your BLOOD - it's such an ingrained part of your personality that it comes really naturally to you. Women can see it in your face when you're doubting yourself, or the opposite - when you're giving yourself compliments inside for getting the attention of an attractive girl. But you know what? If she can see from your face that you are happy to have her attention, she will make the conclusion that talking to beautiful women is a rare thing in your life. AND THAT IS NOT ATTRACTIVE.
5. Staying still. Think of standing water in a lake that has no river where the water could go. The water is STALE. The same with your interactions with women. If you don't keep moving forward physically - touching her lightly, hinting at sexual subtones, flirting and teasing her, getting closer, eventually kissing her - then she will be disappointed. SHE is not going to make the moves. It's up to you to be the man and take your communication with her where it needs to go. It's up to you to lead, and get physical.
Sound familiar? I've been through enough of those. Listen, if you've managed to get a girl's attention, it's not enough. Getting phone numbers from women isn't worth anything if you cannot communicate normally with her when you finally meet her.
Here are the things you need to avoid doing if you want to gain back the POWER in your interactions with women.
1. Being insecure. This is like cyanide when it comes to the relationship between you and the girl. Insecurity is the biggest attraction killer of them all. It means you do not like being in your own body, you do not know what to say when the situation calls for you to say something, you just are not certain at all about your position in life or where you're headed. Almost all women are out looking for a STRONG man. And I don't mean strong physically, I mean strong psychologically. Insecurity displays zero confidence, it telegraphs that you are weak.
2. Being needy. If you don't know many girls, it may seem to you that the one you are talking to is your last chance on Earth to get laid, ever. It may seem that if nothing happens with THIS ONE GIRL, then you're never ever going to succeed with women. And this attitude is the next biggest factor that will all but eliminate your chances with her. Neediness shows up when you NEED the girl to be with you, because apparently no one else want to be with you. This one is easily cured, by the way - just go out and meet more girls!
3. Putting yourself down. A big no-no. You are telegraphing your own self-esteem, or your lack of it, when you talk negatively about anything related to you or your personality. If you keep dissing your previous girlfriends, then what kind of conclusions do you think the girl is going to make about YOU? Hint: they are not very positive ones. I do not mean for you to become an overly optimistic, unrealistic "self-marketer", displaying only the best sides of yourself (though that approach certainly has its merits). But I do mean that you should avoid giving out negative signals about yourself if possible, and focus on your strengths. Men that like themselves and their life are sexy.
4. Not "getting it". Now, what do I mean by getting "it"? It can sometimes be hard to explain, but I think you kind of know what I mean. Getting it means you're in the flow, being successful with women is something that is in your BLOOD - it's such an ingrained part of your personality that it comes really naturally to you. Women can see it in your face when you're doubting yourself, or the opposite - when you're giving yourself compliments inside for getting the attention of an attractive girl. But you know what? If she can see from your face that you are happy to have her attention, she will make the conclusion that talking to beautiful women is a rare thing in your life. AND THAT IS NOT ATTRACTIVE.
5. Staying still. Think of standing water in a lake that has no river where the water could go. The water is STALE. The same with your interactions with women. If you don't keep moving forward physically - touching her lightly, hinting at sexual subtones, flirting and teasing her, getting closer, eventually kissing her - then she will be disappointed. SHE is not going to make the moves. It's up to you to be the man and take your communication with her where it needs to go. It's up to you to lead, and get physical.
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